Author: Corbin

Theresa Corbin is an indoor-sy type who holds a BA in English Lit and an Master's of Library and Information Science. She has lots of opinions and more work experience than cats have lives. Corbin has been a teacher, office manager, hemodialysis tech, fundraiser, designer, interfaith and inter-cultural bridge builder, public speaker, researcher, editor, and writer. Her hero is Elastigirl for obvs reasons. Corbin is a socially poised introverted and HSP. Her hobbies include thinking, giving unsolicited advice, and putting her phone on silent.
Symptoms Someone Is Converting to Islam

Symptoms Someone Is Converting to Islam

by Corbin ♥ 28 Comments

Symptoms of convert header

Written by Theresa Corbin

Of all the things our friends and families could get into, we in the West seem to fear Islam the most. Which is pretty dumb because as someone who has drug addicts and criminals as family members, I can tell you there are much, MUCH worse things (and converting to Islam is NOT a bad thing, fyi).

With so many people in the West converting to Islam, “concerned” citizens have started making claims that halal meat, learning Arabic words, or even eating falafel turns people into Muslims (whatever turning into a Muslim means?! as if you become a vampire). Such claims are beyond absurd, ignorant, and seriously offensive.

muslim cat

But, satire aside, there is a certain paranoia in the West that someone you know might become a Muslim. So in order to calm fears, I have compiled a list of symptoms that someone might display if/when they start to contemplate choosing Islam for their life. Beware!  This is pretty tame stuff.

1. Not Eating pork

Sure, sure it’s bad for your cholesterol and you need to bring down your blood pressure, but if the guy next to you at lunch doesn’t order pork … He might be thinking about becoming a Muslim!

obama
This guy has GOT to be a Muslim. You can tell his sandwich is all beef. The guy behind him is letting the FBI know.

2. Ditching toxic people

I guess it could be just a sign of maturity if the one you love finally breaks up with the loser boy/girlfriend or ditches the drug dealer side kick. But why chance it? They could be converting to Islam!! The horror!

bad company

3. Becoming more respectful to parents

Golly Gee! Your loved one might have finally realized all that their parents had to put up with just to raise them. But, if that same loved one becomes “irrationally” respectful of their parents, why not suspect that the creeping Shariah of Islam has something to do with it? A chilling thought.

parents

4. Being more modest in all matters

Have you noticed your friend or family member stopped twerking in booty shorts, stopped cursing so much, or even stopped claiming they are God’s gift to anything? You wouldn’t be remiss if you suspected Islam was sneaking into their hearts. How dare they!

modesty

5. Stopped being two-faced

If your guy or gal pal is tired of talking cr@p about people behind their backs and actually wants to talk about something real, beware! She/he might be turning Muslim. Make sure they haven’t been slipped some halal meat!

gossip

6. Giving in charity

If someone in your family decides to start giving to the homeless, even though it is illegal in your city, you might have a future Muslim on your hands. Let the outrage begin!

charity

7. Becoming more patient

Did you yell at your loved one and they just hugged you? Weird behavior, right? It might be time to ask them if they have been reading the Quran in secret. You might have a convert on your hands. The humanity!!

kindness

8. Being kinder to everyone

Have you noticed your friend/family member treating people … like … better … like with something that looks like what used to be called kindness … but now its known as weakness. That kindness might not be weakness at all, but an attempt to beautify themselves for God. You might have a Muslim on your hands. Alert the authorities!

kindness

9. Becoming more affectionate

Did your sister, brother, or child just tell you -out of the blue- that they love you?! Strange things are happening. They might be coming down with a infectious case of Islamic behavior. Call the doctor!

loving
either, you shouldn’t either

10. Being less judgemental of others and more critical of themselves

Has your loved one turned their criticism inward? Have they started saying things like, we don’t know what she has been through, or I’ve done stupid things myself, when someone is being judge by others? Hmmm, sounds like the introspection of a Muslim. How dare they?!

judgment

But here is the kicker. Even if your fears are realized. And you have a family member or friend who is converting to Islam, you can still love them. And they will still love you! ❤

muslim family

Up next: A look at the signs someone is becoming a radical/extremist/jihadi. Now THAT is a different matter all together and something to actually be concerned with.

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Take Back Islam: Education Rights of Women

Take Back Islam: Education Rights of Women

by Corbin ♥ 11 Comments

Education rights of womenThere is a saying that many repeat, but some do not apply in their lives, communities, or countries. Educate a women, educate a nation. This saying became very dear to me. It became my mantra. It became the soothing balm when I turned to religious knowledge to fight this denial of education to women.

Educate a women, educate a nation because the child’s first teacher is her mother, because the husband seeks advice from his wife, because a woman who helps herself out of poverty with her education helps her whole family out of poverty. But more than all that, educate a women because education is her basic human right.

The fact that this needs to be said and is not just something everyone knows is truly depressing.

Muslims have a history filled with female scholarship, secular and religions. The Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) set aside days on which to teach the religion to female companions. And he did not just set these days aside to separate women as some will have you think. Men and women sat in sermons together. He set aside a day for women to pay special attention to the women of his community, to give their questions, concerns, and education the attention it deserved.

Abu Sa‘id al-Khudri reports that some women said to the Prophet (PBUH) “men have gone ahead of us (in terms of acquisition of knowledge). Therefore, appoint a special day for our benefit as well.’ The Holy Prophet (PBUH) fixed one day for them. The Prophet (PBUH) would meet them on that day, advise them and educate them about commandments of Allah Almighty”. (saheeh al-Bukhari)

Aishah and Umm Salamah (ra) are among the greatest narrators of hadith. Much of what Muslims practice today in terms of their religion is transmitted via the education of these two great women. The world’s first institution of higher education, the University of Qarawiyyin in Morocco, was established by a Muslim woman, Fatima al-Fihriyya.

fatima_al_fihriyyaAsh-Shifa bint Abdullah was skilled in medicine and appointed by Umar (May Allah be pleased with them both) to a position of public administration during his caliphate. Rabi’ah bint Mu’awwad was a great scholar of Islamic law who taught even the male scholars of Madinah.

Not only did the Prophet (pbuh) facilitate the education of his female companions and set forth an example for future generations. He emphasized the utmost importance of education when he said, “seeking knowledge is mandatory for every Muslim.”

We also find Allah repeatedly telling us in the Quran to ponder, think, analyze, making no distinction between men and women.

read

Seeking of knowledge or education for a Muslim is not distinguished between sacred and secular or even male or female. And the implication of these sayings of the Prophet and directives of the Quran is that every Muslim should pursue his or her education as far as it is possible, remembering that Allah tells us in the Qur’an: “Only those of His Servants who are learned truly, fear Allah” (Al-Qurân, 35:28).

Despite all this, in modern history, some parts of the Muslim world have seen a decline in female scholarship, due to the erosion of women’s rights – God given rights. And as a result, the Islamic world has seen a perpetuation of uneducated and poverty stricken communities and further deterioration of women’s rights.

In many parts of the Muslim world women are being highly educated and that needs to be celebrated. But still the fact remains that this is not true for all women and especially in parts of the world were “Muslim” radicals roam wild. And even if one girl is denied education based on her gender or because of some made up religious ruling, it is a topic the MUST be addressed and thoroughly refuted.

Muslim women graduationIt is of the utmost importance for girls to regain their place at the grammar school desk, for women to take up their spots in the university, and in the tradition of scholarship, to reclaim the tradition of highly educated and empowered Muslim women.

According to a paper by Islamic Relief, a charitable organization which supports education programs throughout the Muslim world, “… girls’ education in particular has been shown to have substantial economic and social benefits … Studies have shown that communities with a high proportion of educated mothers have less health problems.”

Islamic Relief tells a story of one woman named Uzra who not only improved her own life through education, she also benefited the lives of everyone around her.

When Uzra was illiterate, she couldn’t help her children with their studies or read instructions on medication. Now, thanks to our women’s education programme, she can read and write, and runs a business employing 48 women. This income is vital as Uzra’s husband is disabled and cannot work.”

A number of studies show that a girl who is educated is better able to bring up her children in safety. She is better prepared to educate them. She is more likely to keep her family healthy. She will also be able to work and earn a living, crucial in many places where one wage is just not enough. She will likely live a life with less struggles and more fulfilment.

It is of the utmost importance to educate women, to educate our nation, to pull ourselves out of poverty, to have spiritual fulfilment, to have a chance.

muslim women education rights
picture from Dreamstime

Shaykh Mohammad Akram Nadwi says, barring Muslim women from education and religious authority is akin to the pre-Islamic custom of burying girls alive. I tell people, ‘God has given girls qualities and potential.’ If they aren’t allowed to develop them, if they aren’t provided with opportunities to study and learn, it’s basically a live burial.

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What Muslims Get Wrong about Americans

What Muslims Get Wrong about Americans

by Corbin ♥ 15 Comments

what Muslims get wrong heading

Written by Theresa Corbin

As an American and a Muslim, I am trying my best to fill the enormous gap of understanding between the “Western world” and the “Muslim world”. And mostly I have discussed what Americans/Westerners don’t know about Islam and the Muslims, or rather what they get dead wrong.

But today I am flipping the script and talking about what Muslims (from overseas … because there is such a thing as Muslim Americans … me, for example) think about America and Americans that are false or just harmful stereotyping.

This prejudice thing is a two-way street. And the sooner we start thinking in terms of one world, with billions of individuals, instead of us vs. them, the sooner we can get down to the business of peace.

So let me introduce you, who may not know America except through stereotypes, to reality.

1. Americans are gluttonous skinny American

Sure, a large amount of Americans are overweight. Sure, we have a show called “Man versus Food” where a dude eats so much that he almost dies every episode.

And yes, we do have an obesity problem, but it has little to do with gluttony and a lot to do with what the government subsidizes and allows corporations to sell as food that is not really food at all. It’s a whole thing.

BUT Americans are becoming more and more conscious about what they eat and what they think is actually edible (not McDonald’s. that is for sure). As it turns out, tons of Americans are obsessed with healthy living, moderation, and clean eating.

And, we are, in fact, only number 2 in obesity, following Mexico. So much for the chant: “We’re # 1!”.

2. Americans are arrogant

Have you been to France? Yes, this one is true. Except that I can’t think of any group of people that doesn’t have an arrogance problem. This arrogance thing is a human problem. Many people including Americans, are humble, but most human beings are arrogant.

3. Americans are either cowboys or business professionals

Don’t forget about all the hipsters and soccer moms.

4. All Americans hate Muslimsamerican-muslim hug

Nope. Not even close.

Some people really do hate Muslims. But most people are open-minded and welcoming. Generally, Americans have a deep love of difference, exploring other cultures, and learning new things.

5. America is one big mall and everyone is obsessed with consumerism

BEEEPPPP … This is a message from the Emergency Shopping System: BEEEPPPPPP …

We interrupt this regularly scheduled blog because Sephora is having a sale.

Just joking. I have never even been to a Sephora.

This stereotype has its basis in reality. But it is an oversimplification.

Yes, there are shopping centers everywhere and more pop up like weeds. And yes, many Americans go into debt buying crap they do not need. But the problem is not that people want to do this mindless shopping and spending. It is more like big business in cooperation with ad execs have brainwashed us into thinking this is our only purpose in life.

There is, however, a huge movement in the Western world called anti-consumerism. More and more people are opening their eyes to this problem and de-programing their brains.  Google Anti-Consumerism movement to find out more (I’m too lazy to add a link. See why in # 9).

6. Americans are dumb world_according_to_americans

Every group has there stupid people. Just because our dumb people know how to use YouTube and Twitter or start a “news” network and name it after a smart animal (a Fox), doesn’t mean we are all more dumber! 😉

7. America’s elected officials represent the wishes of the people.

So funny! Oh, wait, you really believe that?

Most Americans don’t even know what is done in their names by their “representatives”. After the election is over and officials take office, they pretty much do whatever their campaign financiers tell them, and disregard the needs of the people and the interests of the country. All for the sake of getting more money to be re-elected and do it all over again.

nascar

8. We are all rioting in the streets over racial tension.

Sometimes we march in peaceful protest and sometimes it’s not about race but income inequality or the occupation in Palestine.

We do have problems with racism and riots do break out. But just like the entire Middle East is not constantly in chaos, the US is not in constant riot or threat of riot. It’s a big place that the media can sometimes represent in a small way.

9. Americans are lazy

I am lazy, but I am not exactly representative of the whole.

Follow this link (click here) to find out why “lazy” is an inaccurate representation of the average American and the history of America. That is, unless you are too lazy to read another thing.

10. Americans are rich.

One in five American families are going hungry right now. And homelessness is at crisis levels.  America is home to some very rich people. But those people make up only 1% of our population.  The very rich 1 % own 40% of all wealth in America. To add insult to injury, these rich citizens get major tax breaks (see # 7

by Mike Thompson
by Mike Thompson

to find out why.)

We were once a nation with a large middle class of people who lived comfortably with a lot of surplus.

But now we are a nation in debt and trying to live off of a $7.25 per hour minimum wage (at 40 hours a week if your are lucky to get full time employment), in places where housing costs alone is sky high (at around $2,000 a month in New York). You do the math to see if Americans are rich.

So the next time you decide to hate on Americans, stop and remember we are all in this world together and stereotyping large groups of people is just dumb.

Add to the list in the comments below!

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Anatomy of the Extremist

by Corbin ♥ 7 Comments

Written and (poorly) illustrated by Theresa Corbin

Anatomy of the extremist

The extremist's head

The extremist's eyes

The extremist's mouth

The extremist's hands

The extremist's heart

The extremist's stomach

The extremist's feet

Anatomy of the extremist conclusion

 

 

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Talking in Memphis

by Corbin ♥ 24 Comments
I love Memphis
New Orleans is awesome, but Memphis is giving the “Big Easy” a run for her money.

Written by Theresa Corbin

A couple of weeks ago, I gave a talk inviting people to understand Islam and the Muslims in Memphis, TN. I had many fears before going to Tennessee. Having read about anti-Muslim sentiment in Murfreesboro, TN, I fully expected to be shot.

I went anyway. And instead of hostility, I found the Memphian community full of interfaith camaraderie. I found Muslims working hard to enrich their community and create an atmosphere that fosters understanding and cooperation. I found warm and welcoming non-Muslims who greeted their Muslim neighbours- and me!- with big smiles and kindness.

My experience in this amazing community has enriched my life (and my waistline. Their BBQ ain’t no joke) in so many ways I cannot even begin to explain.

In order to raise awareness about my talk, I had the opportunity to speak about my topic in interviews on TV and radio.

What follows are my interviews:

On TV: WREGClick me: WREG

On Radio:

* Hajar’s son’s name was Ishmael (Peace and blessings be upon him).

**please note that Sarah was not the one who made Abraham leave Hajar in the desert of Mecca. This was a directive from God. I just learned this and feel embarrassed that I let my former Christian understanding of the story — that can be very misogynistic (Eve responsible for the first sin. Not true in Islam)– shape my attitude toward Sarah. 😦

I hope to post the video of my talk “An Open Invitation to Understanding Islam and the Muslims” next week. So stay tuned!

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Humor in Muslim Heritage?

by Corbin ♥ 3 Comments

humor in Muslim Heritage title

Written by Theresa Corbin

Originally published on OnIslam.net-

Did you hear the one about the Priest, the Rabbi, and the Imam who walked in to a bar?

Of course not! Imams don’t drink.

Bad jokes aside, most of the non-Muslim world imagines that Muslims live humorless and austere lives, never even cracking a smile.

Talk of Muslim scholars hearkens images of severe men in ivory towers handing down fatwas to a world they know nothing about – and admittedly and unfortunately sometimes this is true, but it is very far from the majority.

I hear it all the time. Every time I crack wise or show the lighter side of my personality, non-Muslims who happen to be in ear shot are always shocked and make it known that they didn’t expect me to be … gasp … funny!?

Confusion ensues, and I am written off as an anomaly. But this is so far from the truth it is not even … um, well … funny.

The Muslims have a long and hilarious history replete with a smiling and joking Prophet (peace be upon him), prankster companions, Caliphs who knew how to laugh at themselves, jokesters throughout the ages and even a long lost joke book written by revered scholar.

funny hijabi
We got jokes too!

 

A Smiling Prophet

Think of a Prophet, any Prophet. What comes to mind?

For most people, recalling a Prophet is to think of a man suffering in rags, living a sad and hard life.

To the Muslim, a Prophet is someone who is serious when the occasion calls for it, but is good natured and often found smiling. The Prophet Muhammad is often called the smiling prophet and many anecdotes of his joyful and smiling disposition are quoted in hadith.

One such hadith, Abdullah ibn Haarith said:

“I never came across a person who smiled as much as Prophet Muhammad. Prophet Muhammad regarded smiling to a brother as an act of charity.” (At-Tirmidhi, 3641)

"trainers" is the brits' funny way of saying sneakers.
“trainers” is the brits’ funny way of saying sneakers.

He Could Make a Joke

Several instances can be found in the sunnah where the Prophet (peace be upon him) is cracking jokes with his companions and family.

“Once, an old woman came up to him [the Prophet] and asked for paradise. He said:

“Old women do not enter the paradise.”

The woman started crying. As she started leaving the room, the Prophet, showing his subtle sense of humor, stopped her and said:

“Old women will become young before entering the heaven.” (Shama’il Muhammadiya, 230)

He Could Take a Joke

Not only could he dish it out, but he could also take it.

Once a companion of the Prophet named Nuayman (who was a known prankster-may Allah be pleased with him) went to the market and saw some food being sold which appeared to be delicious.

He had some of it sent to the Prophet Muhammad as if it were a gift. The Prophet was happy to receive the lovely gift of food and he and his family ate it. The seller of the food then came to Nuayman to collect the money and Nuayman said to him:

“Go to the Messenger of God it was for him. He and his family ate it.” The seller went to the Prophet asking for the price of the food. The Prophet in turn asked Nuayman:

“Didn’t you give it to me?”

“Yes,” said Nuayman.

“I thought you would like it and I wanted you to eat some of it so I had it presented to you. But I don’t have any dirhams [an increment of money] to pay the seller. So, pay, O Messenger of God!”

The Prophet had a good laugh and so did his companions. The laugh was at his expense, literally, because he had to pay for the unsolicited “gift”.

niqab = face veil naqabi = strong and brave woman who wears face veil.
niqab = face veil
naqabi = strong and brave woman who wears face veil.

His Companions Knew How to Laugh Too

The companions followed suit and didn’t take themselves too seriously. During the caliphate of Uthman after the Prophet’s death, a group of companions were sitting in the mosque. They saw Makhramah ibn Nawfal, who was by this time old and senile.

Makhramah got up to relieve himself and because of his blindness might have done so in the mosque. Nuayman (at it again) got up and went to take him to another place.

Little did Makhramah know, Nuayman had not guided him to the proper place but guided him to relieve himself in a place that was still in the mosque!

People shouted at Makhramah. The poor old man was distressed and said:

“Who has done this?” The people told him it was “An-Nuayman ibn Amr”.

The old man swore and announced that he would knock Nuayman on the head with his stick.

Nuayman left and returned. He was scheming again. He saw Uthman, the leader of the Muslims, performing prayer in the mosque. Nuayman also saw Makhramah. He went up to Makhramah, changed his voice, and said:

“Do you want to get at Nuayman?”

The old man shouted:

“Yes, where is he?”

Nuayman took him by the hand and led him to the place where the Caliph, Uthman, stood and said to him:

“Here he is!”

The old man raised his staff and beat Uthman. Blood flowed and the people shouted:

“It’s the Amir al-Muminin [meaning Uthman]!”

In spite of the blows he had suffered, Uthman was still able to laugh at the deeds of Nuayman.

He can do it. He's just goota be able to stand on his own first and know more Quran than everyone esle. Shouldn't be hard.
He can do it. He’s just gotta be able to stand on his own first and know more Quran than everyone else. Shouldn’t be hard.

Humor of Later Generations

This jovial tradition and pranking doesn’t end with the Prophet or his companions.

Tales are told of a hilarious man named Juha who lived in the 8th. century. Juha was a Muslim and a comedic figure who was famous for his hundreds of stories that still remain popular in the Middle East.

One of Juha’s stories is about him being flawed. He is caught lying and jokes about it:

“A neighbor came to Juha and said:

‘Lend me your donkey, for suddenly I find I have to go on a journey.’

Juha, who did not wish to lend the man his donkey, replied:

‘I would willingly lend it to you, but alas, I sold it yesterday’.

Just then, the donkey, which was in the stable, began to bray in a deafening manner. The neighbor jumped.

‘But your donkey is in the stable,’ he remonstrated. Juha replied angrily:

‘You fool, would you take the word of an ass against mine?'” (Source)

In the 11th. century, a revered Baghdad Muslim scholar known as al-Khatib al-Baghdadi penned a wisecracking guide for party crashers.

“The tome was originally authored by […] a well known scholar of the Prophet Muhammad’s teachings. According to Emily Selove of the University of Manchester, who did the translation, he wrote the book to remind readers ‘that every serious minded person needs to take a break.’” (Source)

Today Muslim scholars follow in this tradition and joke in lecture and on Twitter and Facebook. Muslims around the world laugh along and add to the good natured joshing.

 

If you want to see more comedy from the Muslims check out Baba Ali’s website, check out some of islamwich’s lighter posts, and/or (very highly recommended) plan a trip to Memphis, TN for the Muslims In-Memphis’ Kosher and Halal comedy night on March 21.

mim comedy night

Stay tuned for next week’s post where I tell you all about my adventures, interviews, and talks in Memphis!

 Do you got jokes? Share them in the comments.

Follow us (upper right of the page), email us (islamwich@yahoo.com), like our face with your face on Facebook, like the post, share it, pin it, comment on it, and/or do whatever social media magic it is that you prefer. Find out more about us in the understandably named “About Us” page and browse other posts in our “Table of Contents”.