Podcasted by Kaighla Um Dayo and Theresa Corbin
Too many Muslims are suffering (and forcing their kids to suffer) in an abusive marriage, often under the belief and delusion that somehow Allah loves those who patiently endure abuse at the hands of their spouse. Or, they believe that what they are suffering isn’t *exactly* abuse. Or, worse, they have been told by religious leaders and family members to “stay for the sake of the kids and have patience”.
Here, we refute all these myths.
Written by Kaighla Um Dayo
100% of the regular writers here at islamwich are Muslim. 100% of us are women. 66% of us have been, at one point or another, homeless Muslim women.
Let me tell you: it’s no party.
Recently, I had a Muslim convert come forward and tell her heart-wrenching story of homelessness as a Muslim woman, and I could relate all too well.
Here are just a few things we wish our fellow Muslims knew about what it’s like being homeless, female, and Muslim.
Need we remind you about how much fun it is being a new convert and having most/all of your friends and family turn their backs on you? You can head on over to “Convert Central” for more on that.
Common sense would dictate, though, that if a person had any family or friends to turn to, they would surely have gone that route before appealing to a perfect stranger.
Written by Kaighla Um Dayo
I wore hijab before I was Muslim. And I’m not the only one.
It turns out this is a thing. So much a thing, actually, that there are many women from many faiths coming forward proclaiming their love for hijab.
Here you can read about just one example of a woman who is not Muslim but chooses, of her own accord, to dress in ways that give the impression she is Muslim.
There is an entire movement of women both religious and non-religious who have begun covering their hair. You can learn more about them here, at Wrapunzel. Read more
Written by Kaighla Um Dayo
It was early August, 2009.
I was homeless with my young son, living in a motel. But rather than focusing on finding jobs, I spent all my days and many of my nights alone with my son in my motel room, watching video after video on YouTube of people who had chosen to embrace Islam, many against violent odds.
I had already read ‘The Idiots Guide to Understanding Islam’ written by a convert to Islam called Yahiya Emerick and found myself surprised that many of my own deepest beliefs were held to be true in Islam, as well.
Finally, after weeks of this, I decided to call the local mosque because I wanted to speak with someone in person who had embraced Islam. Unfortunately, in many of the mosques in America, even today, there is no one on staff to answer the phone, and if there is, they don’t often speak fluent English.
So, when I called and asked if I could speak with someone who was a convert to Islam, the message was mixed up and though they took my number, I was sure no one would call me back, ever.
So imagine my surprise when I received a phone call later that same evening from a woman who said she was a Puerto Rican/Italian convert to Islam and would love to answer any questions I had. We arranged to meet at her home the following day. I made an excuse to use my friend’s car, and my son and I went to her house.
Written by Kaighla Um Dayo
I was raised in a generally non-religious but very typical mid-western home.
My parents drank and partied, usually in moderation. If you asked them what their religion was, they would have responded “Christian”, but quickly followed up with some crap about being “a good person, loving God, but not interested in all that church stuff or the rules or whatever“. Unlike my family, I had a very keen interest in God from a young age, and messed around in all the major world religions by the time I was 23 and embraced Islam.
I became a very practicing Evangelical Christian when I was 15 years old, much to the chagrin of my family. Everyone called me a ‘Bible thumper’, meaning I was always justifying my arguments with Bible verses or advising people to behave in Biblically-sound ways. This made me less-than-popular in high school.
By the time I got around to college, I had found my calling: Missions. I wanted to travel the world for Jesus, showing people his love by helping them in practical things in life. My bible college in Illinois called this field “Bi-vocational Missions”. I was in my element and growing.
That was until the actual first day of class wh
en I learned what the Bible actually teaches, along with the agreed upon tenets of the faith, one of which being that people are born with a sinful nature, inclined toward sin, and doomed for hell fire until and unless they decide to accept Jesus as God and worship Him. They like to toss in a clause about an ‘age of accountability,’ but that is nowhere to be found in the Bible, actually. Read more
EDITOR’S NOTE: **UPDATED, This piece previously stated that two people who have been divorced by khul cannot be remarried later. It has been brought to our attention that khula is, in fact, not a permanent end between two people, should they wish to reunite later, assuming they draw up a new contract. We sincerely apologize for this mistake. May Allah forgive and guide us all, ameen.**
It was early April and my sister had just left Egypt. We enjoyed a wonderful family vacation to Luxor, Hurghada and the pyramids at Giza– all on her dime.
Something happened inside my heart being with my sister, being in this strange place with another person for the first time ever who really knew and understood me. I gained a new awareness of the true me I had been forced to repress for years. So when my husband began oppressing and neglecting me again after she left, I knew that I had had enough.
This was the final straw in 5.5 years of heaps of emotional, spiritual, mental and financial neglect.
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