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Which islamwich Are You?

Written by Theresa Corbin

To commemorate nearly 4 years in the blogging game, I have compiled (…er… reposted) a list of types of islamwiches. Try them all, see which one best suits you, and let us know which islamwich you are by taking the poll at the end.

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1 – The Turkey-Ham on Rye 

The Turkey-Ham is a turkey roasted like a ham, meant to taste like a ham, but is totally turkey. This kind of islamwich likes to seem as though he or she is playing it fast and loose.

 

Pros: You tend to know your stuff concerning religious matters. At first glance others might think you are doing something questionable, but you have a million legit proofs to prove them wrong. You don’t follow anyone blindly, and want/expect others to do the same.

 

Cons: You have a hard time admitting you are wrong. You tend to be rebellious and head strong.
Looks like ham. Tastes like ham. Must be turkey
Why we love the Turkey-Ham on rye:
This islamwich knows his or her stuff, and we could learn a thing or three from him/her.

2 – The Zabiha and Veggies on Wheat

The Zabiha and veggies on wheat plays it safe. Just like his/her selection of meat (the Islamic prescribed method of slaughter of an animal for its meat), he/she leave nothing to doubt.

Pros: You are a straight edge gal or fella. You will never lead others wrong and will be the one encouraging your friends and family to fast sunnah fasts and pray on time, every time.

Cons: You often deputizes yourself as the haram police and go about facebook, Muslim gatherings and the masjid correcting people. 

Delicious, nutritious and 100% halal
Why we love the Zabiha and Veggies on Wheat: This islamwich is the moral compass for his or her friends and family. He/she is steadfast and sets a great example.

 

3 – The Gyro

The gyro is a Westerner who is a culture junky. He or she may or may not be Muslim. But he or she loves all things Eastern and may even be an orientalist.

 

Pros: You are pretty well-versed in the history and the current state of affairs of the Middle East.  If you are a she-gyro you probably know how to belly dance, and if you are a he-gyro you might smokes hooka, or vice versa. 😉

 

Cons: You may have very minimal knowledge of Islam, which is cool if you are not a Muslim. But if you are a Muslim, this lack of knowledge can be detrimental to your faith as you are pretty much just practicing a culture, and where the two come together may be a bit blurry for you.
Now I am hungry!

 

Why we love the gyro: He or she loves different cultures and is excited by those who are different. This islamwich takes meeting people of different backgrounds as a learning experience.

 

4 – The Egg and Cheese 

Like the egg and cheese sandwich this islamwich is a morning sandwich … errr … person. He or she is bright eyed and eager to get started in many religious activities.

 

Pros: You are often the one waking everyone in the house up for fajr. Or if you are the sole Muslim in the house, you are might even wake up for fajr without the alarm. You can be found biting your nails waiting for Sha’aban to be over in anticipation for Ramadan. Through your eagerness you give others strength (like the egg sandwich has good proteins and fat). Best of all, you would never judge anyone else because you are too busy encouraging.

 

Cons: Like the egg and cheese sandwich, your shelf life is short. As the day goes by your enthusiasm fades. You need your rest to renew your fervor. And as the year goes by you need to refuel your faith (hence your eagerness for Ramadan).
You’ve got egg all over your face

 

Why we love the egg and cheese sandwich: Every islamwich needs to keep an egg and cheese in their arsenal of friends. He/she will brings encouragement and a glass half full of your favorite beverage attitude.

 

5 – The Ice Cream Sandwich

The ice cream sandwich is the class clown and the masjid president. He or she is clever, amiable and finds humor in everything.

 

Pros: You are the life of any gathering. You have charisma to spare and are always using it to make dawah. Because you are generally outgoing, you have a lot of connections and can be a great matchmaker. 😉   

 

Cons: However, because you are the life of the party you have many friends and it is easy for you to lose track of those who need you the most.   

 

So long, diet :/

 

Why we love the ice cream sandwich: What is not to love? Fun and outgoing make for a great personality combo. Everyone wants to be this islamwich’s friend and this islamwich is down with that.

 

6. The Turkey Club

This islamwich is not Muslim but loves Islam. He or she has been playing with the idea of converting, but is worried about giving up the stuff he/she likes (hence the bacon on his or her turkey sandwich).

 

Pros: You have an open mind and heart in the face of a lot of lies people spread about Islam. You took the time to learn the truth, and that is pretty awesome.

 

Cons: Your predecessor is the Turkey-Ham sandwich. And like the Turkey-ham sandwich, you tend to be rebellious and headstrong.  
Bacon, belief, or belief in bacon? These are the tough questions.
What we love about the Turkey Club: He or she doesn’t believe everything that he/she reads. The Club has to find out for him or herself.  This is a noble quality whether or not Allah chooses to grant him or her guidance.

 

So … which kind of islamwich you are??? Take the poll.

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16 thoughts on “Which islamwich Are You?

  1. Cool idea! I just found these posts and I am really enjoying them! I am a turkey club but I have been pork free for a few months now, some other things are holding me back from taking my Shahadah. :/

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    1. Glad you are enjoying the posts!!! I totally get it. I was a turkey club (pork free too) for years. I had my hang ups, but I can honestly say that taking my Shahadah was the best decision of my life, hands down. If you want to chat with someone who has been there, please email me (islamwich@yahoo.com). Welcome to the world of islamwich 😉

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    2. Hi Lauren,

      As a convert, I have been where you are now. My advice is to take it slowly, and don’t let anyone coerce you into making a decision. Allah brings to Islam whom He wills, and He has placed you on the path. Not everybody walks at the same pace, though.

      Please, for the sake of Allah and for your own sanity, make sure you are ready before taking your Shahadah. And, insha’Allah, after you take it, do not let any person force you into any action beyond your ability. If you only understand one thing at the beginning, let it be this: there is NO compulsion in religion. A decision made with understanding and willingness pleases Allah; a decision made to please man often leads to confusion and resentment.

      This may sound like I’m warning you away from Islam, and that is NOT the case. It was the best decision of my life, and it led me down a beautiful path that now includes a loving husband, beautiful and smart (masha’Allah) daughter and enjoyable career. However, I don’t promote conversion for the sake of conversion — or to please others. Allah knows what’s in your heart, and when He sees you are ready, you will, too.

      Please message me at stephaniesiam@hotmail.com if you have any questions or want someone to talk to who has been there.

      I wish you all the peace and happiness!
      Stephanie

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      1. Size Çok kere yazdım, cevap vermediniz! İslâm’ın emri çarşaftır. Giyinir ve güneş gözĺüğü takınız. diğer resmlerinizin iptalı için çalışınız. İşte size faziletli bir mücâdele safhası.

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  2. Ummm… rebellious and headstrong, oh la la la!
    This poll makes me hungry a lot, what a cool idea and hey so Islamwich is four years old??? right? 🙂

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      1. Hahaha, you got me. Time flies certainly fast and Islamwich has come such a long and successful way, all thanks to the hard work of you and the whole team. MashAllah!

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