Written by Theresa Corbin
In my previous post I wrote about how ridiculous is it to claim that “honor” killings are Islamic (Part I here) when they are in fact murder. The whole time I was writing I kept thinking: talk about the victims, tell their stories and speak out for their justice. I felt I would be remiss if I didn’t challenge the perpetrators of their murders. I wonder if the lives of these women could have been saved if their families really knew what Islam dictated, instead of their culture.
Would they be alive and happy today if only their families knew?
Forced into marriage
Would Shafilea Ahmed’s parents still have murdered her “because she failed to conform to their wishes for an arranged marriage and she allegedly ‘brought shame’ on the family” if they had known that Allah’s Messenger (may peace be upon him) said: “A woman without a husband (or divorced or a widow) must not be married until she is consulted”? (Sahih Muslim)
Would she be alive today if her parents had only read the Quran 4:19 “O ye who believe! Ye are forbidden to inherit women against their will […]”
Or would it not have made any difference to their egos?
Choosing her own husband
Would Saba Maqsood still have been shot for marrying a man she loved if her family had been reminded that a woman has the right to choose her husband, as Khadija choose Muhammad (pbuh) and as many other female companions of the Prophet (pbuh) chose their husband?
Would the family of Saba still feel justified in their crimes against her if they had heard the hadith about a woman who “came to the Prophet, (pbuh), and mentioned that her father had married her against her will, so the Prophet, (pbuh), allowed her to exercise her choice.” ? (Abu Dawud)
Or would they have still allowed cultural dictates to cloud their judgement?
Accused without evidence
graphic by Nicole Elmasry
Would Ayah Ibrahim, still be with us if her uncle who imagined an inappropriate relationship between her and her fiance would have known that accusing women without evidence is a huge sin?
Would Ayah be married to her betrothed today if her suspicious uncle had read this verse of the Quran: “Indeed, those who [falsely] accuse chaste, unaware and believing women are cursed in this world and the Hereafter; and they will have a great punishment” 24:23?
Would her uncle have even cared?
Getting a divorce
Would Mona Mahajneh‘s brother still have shot her if he had known divorce is perfectly acceptable, if he had read one word about divorce in the Quran, if he had known the Prophet himself legitimized divorces between couples and even married a woman name Zaynab bint Jahsh who was divorced?
Would Mona still have been shot in front of her son if her brother wasn’t only concerned about cultural mores that only value a woman based on her virginity?
Being raped
Would the unnamed 10 year old Afghani rape victim still have to fear being killed by her family if they weren’t so horrifyingly ignorant, if they knew that it is the rapist that should suffer the death penalty and not the victim?
Would she have had a chance to heal from her attack if her culture was able to see her as a whole human being and not just a hymen?
I wonder if her father had been the one raped, would he find himself guilty of being impure and call for his own murder?
Having an inappropriate relationship
And would all the women who have been murdered for having a relationship with a man before marriage (real or imagined by family members), would they still be alive if their families had known that flirting, kissing, and even fornicating are not actions punishable by death? Would these women still be alive if their fathers, brothers, uncles were educated even a little bit in Islam and not so much in culture?
Would knowing the following hadith have changed their minds?: When a man approached the Prophet after having kissed a woman, seeking forgiveness and guidance. God revealed to the Prophet the following verse: “‘And perform the prayers, between the two ends of the day and in some hours of the night. Verily, the good deeds efface the evil deeds,’ (11:114). The man asked the Messenger of God ﷺ if the revelation of this verse applied only to his situation. The Messenger of God responded, ‘It applies to all my ummah [nation of Muslims around the world, male and female].’” (Bukhari)
Or would they still have clung to a false and paranoid idea of “honor”?
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Would any of these women be victims today had their family members truly known what Islam dictates? Or would cruel and irrational cultural practices have won out in the end anyway? Islam came to free us from these backwards, ignorant and evil practices, but still we find that many cling to culture over Islam, and still more claim their culture is Islam. In this willful ignorance women suffer, are murdered and are living in fear for no reason other than power plays, appearances, and egotism.
No more! It is time we educate ourselves and our families. It is time we pry culture away from Islam and know the difference, and know those who wish to abuse power falsely in it’s name. It is time we stop hiding behind culture and admit when wrong is wrong. It is time to expose the truth, save lives, and end these ignorant and detrimental practices. It is well past time to #TakeBackIslam
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Great post, Sis!
This topic is so interesting to discuss. I searched a few verses from Qurán those suitable with it.
Let’s see surah Annisa verse: 93
“Any one who kill a believer intentionally will be cast into Hell to abide there forever and suffer Allah’s anger and damnation. For him a greater punishment awaits.”
Then in surah Al Isra’verse 33, Allah has forbidden us to kill a soul, unless in a just cause.
“And do not take a life, which Allah has forbidden, except in a just cause. We have given the right (of redress) to the heir of the person who is killed, but he should not exceed the limits (of justice) by slaying (the killer), for he will be judged (by the same law).”
But, in Islam there are verses about Qishas,”the punishments rules for the sins men” it obtains in wars and killing intentionally cases.
Here is, surah Al-Maaida verse 45.
“And there (in the Torah) We had ordained for them a life for a life, and an eye for an eye, and a nose for a nose, and an ear for an ear, and a tooth for a tooth, and for wounds retribution, though he who forgoes it out of charity, atones for his sins. And those who do not judge by Allah’s revelations are unjust.”
The verse above is about Qishas, it isn’t legitimation for killing a soul. There are always rules for it. Allah is The Just.
I ever read about Hindu tradition;
If a husband died, the people will burn his wife too. Oh My God, how pity his wife is! Islam doesn’t allow it, of course.
The other story, it’s about animism tradition in Javanese. Long time ago before Islam came to my country (Indonesia), the people practiced animism and dynamism. They believed to Gods. God of any kind, such as volcano God, sea God, etc. In dry monsoon, they would give something used to prevent disease, such a young girl whom never gets marriage. They throw her into crater. I don’t know how many girls became victims in that time. When Islam came, the stupid traditions changed in to Islam slowly. Alhamdulillah.
SO, I STRONGLY AGREE WITH YOU, MY SIS!
[Sorry for some spellings errors 😉 ]
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VERY wonderful points. Islam came to rid people from the evil of these practices including ones that devalue lives of women. Thank you for taking the time to add these verses that support the point of this post. Jazakum Allah Khair.
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My sincerely pleasure, my sister! 😊
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And if there is moslem/ moslem arbiter, still practice this stupid act, so it isn’t the name of Islam.
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Sister Corbin, my wordpress just got reinstated, sorry for the delay!!!
Wonderful post about the Honor related violence issues and while most western media is portraying these killings with links to Islam, I find it horribly hypocritical because “spouse-partner violence” killings, etc are not uncommon either.
The whole notion of “honor lies in the bodies of women” makes me want to make a AIRSPACE TITANIC and ship away all women from this globe far far away until mankind comes to terms that there is no honor in violence.
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So glad to hear things are back up and running! was worried there for a moment. Indeed the West wishes to point the finger at Eastern violence so that they will not have to look at their own problems. I am wondering if this is not man’s state: he hates and blames others so he does not have to deal with his own self. This has been the theme of my musing lately. But I really do take issue when ignorant, troglodytes who claim it is validated through Islam. I say seal up their caves so they cannot get out to ruin the world with their evil.
What a wonderful idea! Let men figure out how to deal with themselves and their notion of honor while we women leave. Might I suggest a planet with a mild an beachy climate, that serves many non-alcoholic pina coladas?
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Glad to hear your site is back up and running! you had me worried. What a great idea. We should leave the men folk so they can deal with their issues, while we all go to a far away planet and relax. might I suggest a temperate, beachy planet that serves non-alcoholic pina coladas?
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Again, these immature tactics of “letting men figure it out” are classy power point bullets, but sister do they ever solve the issues ? How come things have gotten only worse, never better, even with all this support and knowledge & manjainas, how come things never get any better ? Is that fashionable to say statements such as “abandoning men” “letting men deal with it”, etc ? There is no man without woman nor no woman without man. Women DO NEED men and men DO NEED women.
(Of course I agree with your last few posts, but my last few may comments may seem acerbic because they are based on the fact that these issues of domestic violence, killings, gender roles in society, I have come very close to. Along with encomiums and religio-philosophy, I have decided to come out of closet once and for all as a anti-feminist )
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Thanks, I too was like pretty stressed about it, finally am back! Well, you know its an idea and who knows they might come up with some sense while we are sipping non alcoholic pina coladas in a far away galaxy with sandy beaches and tropical fruit havens.
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Why are you people always so fantastical in your ideas ? Have you ever a read a book in history ? How many men have died in wars so you can sit there and write about “curing violence” ? And let’s stop pretending women are saints; fr the best they are equal partners in perpetuating violence. It’s very fashionable to say men are this and that, but never the other way around.
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Oh Hyde……are you going to say that family members are equal in doling out punishment to their boys the same as their girls when it comes to this sort of thing? Perhaps there are instances of honor killings that claim men as their victims. This article did not seek to point out women are victims of ALL violence ONLY. It sought to reeducate those who think they are killing according to the will of Allah and bring the truth to those who never knew the difference. I think Corbin has done a wonderful job of providing examples and refutations.
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Acknowledged, that Sister Corbin was elucidating and differentiating beaten the status quo mindset, particularly when pertaining to Islam, but when this pickle point of feminism is regurgitated, I’m afraid as a chivalrous gentleman I must stand up.
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